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- Cervecería Centro Americana, S.A.
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Cervecería Centro Americana, S.A.
Style | ABV
American Adjunct Lager
| ABV ?
No notes at this time.
| Show Hads:
look: 2.5 | smell: 1.5 | taste: 1 | feel: 1 | overall: 1
Poured into a Lucifer tulip on 3/23/11
So, back in March MbpBugeye tells me he has the blind to end all blinds for Spider889 and me to try. He tells me that I will have an immediate reaction of some kind upon the beer being poured. i tell him I'll surrender no such reaction. After a lengthy back and forth we decide on a friendly wager - if I have a reaction, I buy a round at Bodega; if i have no reaction, he buys the round.
Upon presenting the bottle, he's got it wrapped in aluminum foil with the effigy: "Here Lies Ryan011235." We'll see about that.
Here are the notes:
Uh, ok... Pours a bizarre teal color. Like Listerine (blue and green mixed together) only a tad darker. Casts more of a green hue on white paper. The color is cracking me up, but I can't have a reaction. Loose, bubbly head dissipates almost immediately. Minimal, wispy retention and a collar. Ok lace.
Comparably weird aroma. Smells skunky; not just that "my beer is skunked" way, but actually like skunk or weed. A little bit rotten; rotten onion a la GUBNA. Herbal, grassy hop notions. vague suggestion of artificial berries. Moderately grainy with some corn. Dry erase marker. Kind of industrial.
Well, it sure don't taste like Orange Squeez-it. Astoundingly devoid of any saving grace. Tastes wretched. Whereas the nose was at least interesting, the taste is dry, dirty and stale. Watered-down adjunct and husk. Tastes a lot like a plethora of envelope glue resin. Really artificial. Yuck.
Feels bad, too. Nearly devoid of carbonation; all but flat. Dry, dirty, gritty finish. Lingerings of misery.
Overall impression? Get out of town. Ugh.
Epilogue: MbpBugeye still owes me that round.
Serving type: bottle
07-21-2011 04:39:33 |
More by Ryan011235
look: 1 | smell: 1 | taste: 1 | feel: 1 | overall: 1
This was sent to me 'blind' but I knew what it was when I poured it. Huge thanks to MbpBugeye for sending me this one.
To quote the great Patrice O'Neal- "I had to go to a thesaurus and get synonyms for 'awful', because I didn't know enough. It was repulsive, disgusting, and dreadful. It stinks."
A- Fuckin' blue?!? Like gatorade on the pour. Thin body and minimal bubbles let me know that it's a beer. Alluring, in a morbid-curiosity kinda way. Looks like the blue backing they put on aquariums in the pet store. As I look at it after a few sips, I swear it's seperating, like oil and water. Yeah, that's terrible.
S- Dead. Faint cooked veggies, undefined grains.
T- Man, I wish this tasted like it looked- I wish this was a malternative 'blue razz krush' or something. Instead, it tastes like stale malt water. Wilted vegitation and prickly bubbles. Imitation sweetener and tonic water. I'm surprised- I didn't know it was possible to make a beer that only contains off-flavors and no good flavors.
M- 'Stale malt water' has the mouthfeel I expected... horrible flavors that don't have enough help from the (lack of) carbonation... Slick in the mouth at some point. The dye has a specific gravity/viscosity that is seperate from the beer, I think. Whatever it is, I'm not sticking around to dissect this any longer.
O- Did not finish. Be careful what you wish for... someone just might send it to you.
The worst beer I've ever had.
Serving type: bottle
04-06-2011 21:08:23 |
More by ShogoKawada
look: 2.5 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 1 | feel: 1 | overall: 1.5
Perhaps I went a little too far to acquire a couple bottles of this. Perhaps I traded down, way down. Perhaps I could have gotten more for 2 bottles of Hopslam and 2 bottles of Columbus IPA. But this wasn't about landing a good beer. This was about pure, uncut, Guatemalan AWESOME. Awesome the likes of which have probably not been seen within the limits of Columbus, Ohio. This was awesome on a galactic level.
And so I blinded it and set forth pouring this blue elixir into the glasses of my friends, Ryan011235 and Spider889.
Once the awesomesauce hits the glass there is a fizzy head, the consistency of which is in the typical range for an adjunct laden light beer. The color of the head, well that's not in the typical range for anything, anywhere. Its a robin's egg blue color, the kind of color that you paint a baby boy's room.
The color of the beer wasn't a surprise to me. I mean they put it in clear bottles for the color alone. And I'm sure they've never sold a bottle for any reason other than "Oh, dude! Look, its a blue fuggin beer! lulz!" But that's pretty much what I said when I found this listing.
The color makes me think of the water at Myrtle Beach put-put golf courses. Its a green-blue, I suspect the greenish tint is because they couldn't make a perfectly colorless beer.
It looks like what I'd imagine hippie vomit would look like, only not full of bits of hummus and organic alfalfa sprouts.
So seeing as how a sick hippie makes me happy, I think this beer actually looks halfway decent. I mean the head faded away quickly, but there are plenty of spots of sticky foam trying to feign some sort of lacing.
The aroma isn't THAT bad either, once the room is aired out of the potent skunk smell that wafted up from the bottle and stuck its fingers in my nose and slapped me in the face like on Loony Toons or something. I mean I can actually pick out real malts and things. It does have some odd smells, but there is worse. Notes of some strange blue raspberry scented marker are hard to avoid. This is probably the dye imparting its lovely complexities to the beer.
Thankfully this tastes pretty awful, and my hopes are again lifted. It starts out sweet as hell on the tip of the tongue. There's that odd fruitness that is probably mostly dye. The rest of the taste is flaccid corn husk and boiled roughage. Lots of mineral water, or like drinking from some strange well.
The mouthfeel is one of the worst. Damn near no carbonation. Its like water. But if this were coming out of my taps I'd call Homeland Security. I really do think they just snuck into a mini golf course over night and dipped a case of bottles in the water traps, because as far as I can tell, this isn't alcoholic in anyway.
After having had this beer the rest of my time here on BA can be viewed as retirement. I've already peaked and now it's time to kick back and reminisce on my achievements, such as this.
Serving type: bottle
03-25-2011 19:20:01 |
More by MbpBugeye
look: 1.5 | smell: 1.5 | taste: 1.5 | feel: 1 | overall: 1
"Earth, home to well over six billion people.
A most majestic and brilliant sight, when seen through the eyes of peace.
Foreboding, to say the least when caught in the gears of the machine.
With the world blindfolded by the lust for power, wealth and control.
A perfect game board is laid out for two divine powers, to manipulate the pawns into position to carry out their conquest for global domination.
For you see, this world has many mysteries, and nothing is ever what it seems to be.
Every action starts with a thought,
Every thought comes from influence,
Every influence has its roots.
The world is either good or evil and this is where our story begins..."
-- Winds of Plague
Bottle was shared with Ryan011235 by MbpBugeye.
Dubbed, "the blind to end all blinds."
Yikes. Sounded "foreboding to say the least." I immediately thought of Triple Bock. So I quietly braced myself for some gut-wrenchingly awful beer, and inwardly prayed that I wouldn't lose all desire for beer as a result of this tasting.
Bottle was covered in aluminum foil. We discover that the cap was covered in gold foil. Then as the cap is removed, you can see a clear bottle underneath that is actually a twist-off.
Then came the pour. With a resounding, "Oh my god!!" I yelled out as a BRIGHT blue liquid poured forth from the bottle into a tulip. Surely this was not actually beer.
My thoughts on the color:
Blue curacao or Hypnotic
It seemed to be all of these things and more. The color was simply too much to bear.
A fast rising head appeared - a pastel Easter egg color baby blue, then it quickly withdrew. At first there was some visible carbonation, but as the minutes passed, the beer quickly became dull and lifeless. The liquid did have decent clarity. But still... the blue, MY GOD THE BLUE!
Ohh, and I almost forgot: IT DYED OUR TEETH AND TONGUES BLUE!!!
If ever there was such a plethora of unbalanced aromas...
Initially there was a strong skunkiness. This beer was light struck to the highest degree.
Skunk gave way to bad weed. I noted that it smelled like my pot-head brother back in high school, when he'd have clouds of cheap trailer-park weed wafting out his window, while hideously vile incense burned to "mask" it from my mother. The combination of the two was far worse than either alone, and that combination is what I was experiencing with this beer.
Over time as the skunk fell back, I courageously drove my entire nose into the tulip.
Out came an odd sweetness. I described it as almost gueuze-y - but this was no ordinary gueuze - this was the worst possible kind of gueuze.
Imagine gueuze that was fermented not in oak wine barrels, but in a square box made from the ancient planks of a pirate ship's poop deck. Then imagine that the box is held together with tetanus-bearing rusty nails - adding to the mineral notes. Finally, the loose-fittings mean that the beer is truly wildly fermented - except that the brewer had nowhere else to store the beer but next to a dumpster. So, not only did all the wild yeast get in, but so did the following:
-garbage juices - you know, that runoff from a leaky old garbage can or dumpster that flows like some 1940's horror movie ooze in the heat of the summer.
-dissolved bird droppings
-stray cat urine and "in-heat spray"
-bubonic plague, because if it's going to see a resurgence anywhere on earth, it would be inside the fermenting box of this beer
The taste was mostly flat mineral water.
The finish is dull - like Playdoh or sticky tack that leaves you questioning if the gueuze was actually a kriek - except that they forgot to add cherries, and instead added modeling clay.
This beer got flat in a hurry. It is a dull, slimy, bland torrent of wasted effort. A gimmick beer for sure.
Figures some die-hard Trekkie would commission some once-mentioned sci-fi brew to be made commercially.
Guatemala? Seriously? I am now wondering if I ought to get tested for equatorial, third world diseases.
Light struck beer, eh? Guess that was spot on. The damn stuff probably sat out in the tropical heat and sun for weeks (in clear bottles no less).
Abnormally blue? Maybe this beer was meant to be consumed by bored little Guatemalan children.
Swooning speakers of Klingon aside, this was a bad beer. Still not as gross as the dreaded Triple Bock or the others I mentioned, but definitely only worthwhile in the context we were in. Well played Seth - neither Ryan nor I could guess this.
The only reason you could give this a high rating is if you love Star Trek more than real life. And I'll tell you one more thing: if this is the best beer a superior alien race can concoct - then my fantasies of the future, space travel, and the hope we find life other than ourselves someday have all been dashed.
"and the world is either good or evil..."
No... Trekkies are evil.
Serving type: bottle
03-25-2011 18:16:05 |
More by Spider889
look: 3 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 2
12oz gold foil capped bottle, shared with a Trekker friend who procured it via a paper trail that made my head spin...
This beer pours a deep mouthwash blue hue, the sky, the ocean, and my baby blues all rolled into one. From it rises two fingers of foamy pale blue cotton candy, uh, I mean head, which settles at an even pace, leaving some streaks of flossy lace in its wake. Looks like what it's supposed to, I guess. It smells of sweet sugary malt, almond paste, artificial juice crystals, and a hot plastic essence. The taste is bland pale malt, weirdly sweet spoiled fruit, and a dead flower, industrial solvent bitterness. The carbonation is on the low side, the body medium weight, though cloying as if the replicator was on the fritz. This hot mess finishes still quite sweet and tainted, a growing mustiness adding another layer of dead.
For all the strange unpleasantness of this gimmick, I can't help but think that a large part of it is due to my brain co-mingling visual and oral signals. When I don't look at my glass, or think too hard, this doesn't taste any worse than a lot of "Primo" lagers from South America and elsewhere. I was also informed that 'Romulan Ale' is verboten in the Federation of Planets, but I still remember seeing certain characters drinking it when I watched the various incarnations as a kid. As for quality - just like adulterated whiskey during Prohibition, there's a reality-spanning lesson to be learned here.
Serving type: bottle
03-07-2011 23:54:46 |
More by biboergosum
look: 1.5 | smell: 1 | taste: 1.5 | feel: 2 | overall: 1
12oz. bottle into a tulip glass.
Several conspiring variables led to my the trying of this beer. One: It's bright blue. BRIGHT-FUCKING-BLUE in the bottle with golden foil surrounding the cap. Tell me what beer geek can pass THAT up? Yeah, didn't think so...Two: It's brewed in Guatemala. Three: Single purchase at Drug Emporium in Huntington, WV.
On to the beverage: the color is abhorrently blue--picture the water at a mini-golf course. No head, clear body. Stains the tongue. The aroma suggests a mix of festering cabbage and hot garbage juice. Maybe some over-steamed veggies and corn-sugar sweetness, but that's almost a stretch.
The flavor does little to correct for a god-awful start. If anything can be said to possibly rectify this beer, it's that the flavor isn't TOO off-putting. Still, there's not much taste to be had. The mouthfeel is carbonated; the body, thin. Leaves a bit of sticky sugar on the back of the palate. To say this was an experience would be an understatement. I just hope the drain doesn't stay blue for too long after I pour the remainder of this beer down it.
Serving type: bottle
12-25-2010 02:33:30 |
More by wagenvolks
look: 2 | smell: 2 | taste: 1 | feel: 1.5 | overall: 1
Served in a pint glass
Ok, now it's time for the fun stuff. Guys weekend Northern Wisconsin and Romulan Ale. I would like to say thanks to TMoney2591 for sharing this with all of us, but then I tried it. First off, I'm not a Star Trek nerd. Though I did consult one who informed me that this was illegal in many systems. I can now see why. First of all this is really really blue. It pours that, with a blue foam head...which is upsetting. The smell is not good in the slightest. It smells of old low grade apple juice where there's no real juice in it. And maybe the same style beverage, but of strawberry instead. It's hard to tell because it's really hard to keep smelling this. It's awful. The taste is one of the most foul things that I've ever willingly put into my mouth. Trying to decipher the flavors took many sips to get past the "Jesus Christ, Why!" taste. Other than rotten apples I think that the flavors may have been a mixture of vinegar, paint, and household cleaners specifically Windex. If you aren't meant to consume it...it's probably in here. This thing is wrong, I feel like I've been poisoned. I think I might have been. My tongue is blue! Either from the copious amounts of Blue #40 they used or the lack of oxygen going to my head now. Thank God I didn't have the whole bottle it was shared by others. Aside from the novelty of it, I recommend disposing of it with fire. Be careful though I fear it'll give off noxious/toxic fumes so stand upwind of the flames!
Serving type: bottle
09-20-2010 03:00:42 |
More by Vdubb86
look: 3.5 | smell: 2 | taste: 1 | feel: 3 | overall: 1.5
Served in a Dogfish Head snifter.
Big thanks to connecticutpoet for this oddball bottle!
Ever since I heard of this thing, I sought it out, and, thanks to Darren, I was able to obtain it. One of the "conditions" of the trade, though, was that I share it with a group of friends. A fishing trip this weekend was the perfect opportunity to do just that. It was quite an experience.
It pours a bright cerulean topped by a half-finger of sky blue-tinted foam. The appearance gets a slight boost based on pure novelty. I'm told it matches the Star Trek drink very closely. Right on. The nose begins the downward spiral with notes of burnt apple cider, watermelon bubblegum, and fake grape flavoring. Ay carumba, what a strange and odd smell. The taste comprises vinyl, light blue raspberry (though this may just be in my head due to the color), and hardship. There really is no way to positively describe the taste of this thing. (Just for kicks, some of the responses from the group referred to the taste as "bestiality" and "Trek ass".) Frankly, I will continuously refer to this beer as Haterade for what it did to my friends and me. It will most likely be the subject of jokes for a while to come. The body is quite light, with a light moderate carbonation and a mean disposition.
In the end, a feeling of shock and confusion fell over the group, particularly over why this beer was made, why they had blue-tinged tongues after drinking a beer, and why I would share it with people I didn't hate (and why I would try so vigorously to obtain such a drink). Honestly, that is what makes this beer (and the trade that brought it to me) a success. It was an entertaining experience that none of us is likely to forget any time soon. I suggest more people indulge in such borderline sadism/masochism in order to truly appreciate the beer-drinking experience. Thanks again, Darren, and picture of the group "enjoying" the beer is on its way.
Serving type: bottle
09-20-2010 02:56:06 |
More by TMoney2591
look: 4 | smell: 2 | taste: 2 | feel: 2 | overall: 2.5
A strange baby blue pour ,with a big fizzy light blue head , very carbonated. Aroma of sugar,corn and faint skunky hops . Flavor is of cheap corn beer ,cooked vegetables, and light hops , very bland and lacking any quality in aroma and flavor, light bitterness , light body and a fizzy overcarbonated mouthfeel . This looks cool in the bottle , but not something I would ever buy again .
Serving type: bottle
08-14-2009 21:50:31 |
More by WakeandBake
look: 4 | smell: 2.5 | taste: 2.5 | feel: 2.5 | overall: 3.5
Poured from a clear 12 ounce glass bottle into a flute. Apparently rights for this beer have been passed from Cerveceria La Constancia S.A.
Appearance: Very eye catching. Sky blue fizzy head foams up before settling to a small patch of light blue on top of the beer. The body of the beer is mostly deep blue with some slight greenish hues.
Smell: Like a cheap, slightly skunked light lager.
Taste: I was hoping there would be something more to the taste. Extremely bland, as in fizzy water with a hint of skunk.
Serving type: bottle
07-29-2009 04:03:59 |
More by BierFan
Romulan Ale from Cervecería Centro Americana, S.A.
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